i started this site on accident. i knew that i wanted it to happen but i didn’t know when. i had the idea and i’d talk about it with friends but i didn’t plan on launching it for a while. i was just so frustrated with being stagnant. i hate when i’m in between projects.

i planned on shooting a short film at the end of september but those plans are in jeopardy. it’s really tough getting a group of strangers to buy into an idea that wasn’t their own. there isn’t the same type of ownership. i met with homie shelby and my brother to make happen but as time passed things grew more and more complicated. i still want to film but i want to do it correctly. productions are expensive and i’m not trying to play myself or waste other people’s time. maybe tomorrow i can let you read the script.

anyway while i was figuring out how i was going to pull this production off i was spending a lot of time bullshitting on youtube or binge watching tv shows. drake dropped scorpion and i had to talk about it. i didn’t have a podcast or a blog but i had something to say. i wrote 2500 words about drake growing from a startup to a corporation. i sent it to my friends. a couple of friends suggested i submitted it to blavity. blavity posted it the next day. it felt amazing seeing my writing published. i submitted 5000 words on baltimore and “the wire” . again, it was accepted and posted the next day.

things were great but they kept changing my article titles and killing all intrigue, in my opinion. i submitted my next article to made magazine. an editor from the magazine contacted me for my instagram handle. it was “woneywill” at the time. the name had a cool meaning but no one would know it was me. i wanted my new name to be associated with my site but i didn’t have a site. i designed my site on squarespace, bought the domain and changed my instagram name to “merchkels”. i didn’t realize that my site was live as soon as i bought the domain. i sent the live link to my site to my friends. they liked it. so what was i afraid of?

i was afraid people would read my writing and hate it. no more mystery about what i do and how i do it. it’s out there for all to see. i was also afraid because lately God had blessed me with everything i’ve wanted. if i work my ass off and give everything within me, i can accomplish anything. the pressure is on me to execute now. no more excuses, no more waiting, no more pointing at other people, it’s on me. so i really don’t know what i’m doing. i’m just doing what feels right and everything else will come.